I'm sitting in a Starbucks drinking a cup of their Thanksgiving blend (because it's November 1st and that's what ones does) observing the world around me. The barista talking with a customer about how he and his grandma got into a fight on Facebook about politics. The lady across from me eating a Pumpkin Reeses while reading something on her phone. The two college-aged girls chatting with smiles stretched across their faces. There are days when I am exceptionally sensitive to those around me. Most of the time I am moving way too fast to be receptive...to experience the present moment, but not today.
Perhaps it's due to the fact that it's All Saints Day. I am quite aware of the fact that each person I'm interacting with is a gifted, unique individual who likely has saintly qualities. I've been thinking a lot today about the saints I've been grateful to know in my life. Last night when I got home after sundown I decided to light my St. Connie candle.
I cut off the TV and sat by candlelight for a few minutes, glancing at the flickering flame, allowing the fact that my mom is dead to sink in once again.
I love All Saints Day. It evokes a gratefulness in me. It causes me to be mindful. But it's also a reminder that some of the most influential saints in my life aren't here anymore. I know I'm not the only one with a heavy heart today. There's something about the collect for the day that is really bringing me comfort, so I thought I would share. "Ineffable joys." Joys that are too extreme to be expressed in words.
Almighty God, you have knit together your elect in one communion and fellowship in the mystical body of your Son Christ our Lord: Give us grace so to follow your blessed saints in all virtuous and godly living, that we may come to those ineffable joys that you have prepared for those who truly love you; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who with you and the Holy Spirit lives and reigns, one God, in glory everlasting. Amen. (BCP)